Thursday, May 31, 2007

Favorite Mike Tyson Quotes:

Someone sent me a link to a collection of famous Mike Tyson quotes. I just had to share. He may be a pop culture afterhought, but these lines will live forever:

"Lennox Lewis, I'm coming for you man. My style is impetuous. My defense is impregnable, and I'm just ferocious. I want your heart. I want to eat his children. Praise be to Allah!"

Tyson on Tyrell Biggs' complaining to him about low blows "Low blows? Low blows? Huh! Motherf**ker you're fittin' to die!" "He was screaming like my wife." "I could have knocked him out in the third round but I wanted to do it slowly, so he would remember this night for a long time."

"I paid a worker at New York's zoo to re-open it just for me and Robin. When we got to the gorilla cage there was 1 big silverback gorilla there just bullying all the other gorillas. They were so powerful but their eyes were like an innocent infant. I offered the attendant $10,000 to open the cage and let smash that silverback's snotbox! He declined."

"One morning I woke up and found my favorite pigeon, Julius, had died I was devastated and was gonna use his crate as my stickball bat to honor him. I left the crate on my stoop and went in to get something and I returned to see the sanitation man put the crate into the crusher. I rushed him and caught him flush on the temple with a titanic right hand he was out cold, convulsing on the floor like an infantile retard."

"How dare these boxers challenge me with their primitive skills? It makes me angry. They're just as good as dead." "My power is discombobulatingly devastating I could feel is muscle tissues collapse under my force. It's ludicrous these mortals even attempt to enter my realm."

“I want to throw down your kid and stomp on his testicles, and then you will know what it is like to experience waking up everyday as me. And only then will you feel my pain.”

"All praise is to Allah, I'll fight any man, any animal, if Jesus were here I'd fight him too."

"They don't have the heart that I have. I've lived places they can't defecate in."

"I'm not Mother Teresa. But I'm also not Charles Manson!"

"I'm on the Zoloft to keep from killing y'all."

"He called me a ‘rapist’ and a ‘recluse.’ I’m not a recluse.”

"I really dig Hannibal. Hannibal had real guts. He rode elephants into Cartilage."

"I guess I'm gonna fade into Bolivia."

"I can sell out Madison Square Garden masturbating."

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